A-Z of separation/divorce

Child counsellor
Someone who helps a child going through a hard time when his or her parents split up. They are in some areas of the UK only. Call your nearest NCH mediation service to see if there is one near you.

Children and family reporter
An official from the Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service (Cafcass) who advises the court. Cafcass looks after the interests of children involved in family court proceedings. It works with children and their families, and then tells the court what they think are the best arrangements for you.

Contact

The time you will spend with the parent you don’t live with.

County court /family proceedings court
A court for your local area. These are special courts that look after families for instance, when parents who are separating or divorcing can’t agree on arrangements for their children.

Divorce
When a married couple want to split up, a judge decides if their marriage can be ended. The legal word for this is divorce. The judge will only give a divorce, if he is satisfied with the plans your parents have made for you.

To get a divorce your mum and dad will have to fill in a form telling the judge lots of things including:

Where you will live
Who will live with you
Where you will go to school
Arrangements for you to see the parent you don't live with, and anyone else who is important to you, like brothers, sisters and grandparents.

Divorce ends your parents' marriage, but they are still your mum and dad.

Family counsellor
An adult specially trained to help parents and families with their personal problems.

Half brother or half sister
The son or daughter of your parent and your step parent.

Judge
A person who is specially trained in law. Judges work in courts. It is the judge's job to decide what's best for you if your parents can't agree. If the judge has to decide things about your future, he or she will take your wishes into account. The judge will listen to what everybody thinks and then decide what to do.

Lawyer/solicitor
A specialist on the law who helps people make arrangements about matters such as which parent children live with and where.
Lawyers/solicitors give advice and speak for parents in court if they cannot agree and have to ask a judge to decide what to do.

Magistrate
A type of judge who works in the family proceedings court.

Maintenance
Money that one parent pays to the other to look after you.

Mediators
People trained to help parents who are splitting up talk together about what their children need and want.

Residence
You have residence with the parent you will live with. This is also the main person to look after you. Residence can be with one of your parents, or be shared by both Mum and Dad.

Separated
When your parents stop living together, and live in different places.

Stepfather/stepmother/stepparent
Someone who marries your mother or father after they divorced.

Stepsister or stepbrother
The son or daughter of your stepparent born before they got together with your mum or dad.

Remember, it’s not your fault.